Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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