Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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