I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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