She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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