Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Randomize
