oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
