oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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