Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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