i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
