So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
