They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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