I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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