I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
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