no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
only if we run a train.
done.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize