Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
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