He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
