The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
