So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Randomize
