There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Randomize
