U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
It's not a walk of shame if you run
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize