wanna go halves on a baby?
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
