Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Is Oprah even human
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
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