I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
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