You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
