they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Randomize
