bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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