Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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