I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
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