Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
