Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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