Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize