Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
