no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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