You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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