hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
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