Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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