sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
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