Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
