We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Randomize
