Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
