Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
