I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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