so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Randomize