I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Just invented taco cereal.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
