I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
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