When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
