That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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