she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize
