yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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