Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I skipped work to stalk him.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
