mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize
